Real Age Test

Yesterday I found a link on WISTV web site where you could take a test and it would tell you how old you really are. Most people know how old they are in calendar years, but don't have a clue how old they are in "REAL BIOLOGICAL YEARS". This test will tell you if you are biologically younger, older or the same as your calendar years.

Since tomorrow is my 64th birthday (8-30-08) I decided to take the test and see just how young and youthful I really am. Well, the test results did not turn out the way I thought they would. In fact the results of the test made me feel older than the man pictured in this blog or as the old saying goes "Older than Dirt". The stupid test told me that I was really 68 1/2 years old - can you believe how flawed some test are!!!!!

If you have the nerve to take this test click on the title to this post above and it will take you to the site where you can get insulted. You might save sometime by just looking in a mirror!

Have a youthful day!

WHAT IS GRITS?

I received an email this morning explaining a lot about grits, and I would like to share part of it with you. You can't acquire knowledge like this just anywhere!

Nobody knows. Some folks believe grits are grown on bushes and are harvested by midgets by shaking the bushes after spreading sheets around them. Many people feel that grits are made from ground up bits of white corn. These are obviously lies spread by Communists and terrorists. Nothing as good as grits can be made from corn.

The most recent research suggest that the mysterious Manna that God rained down upon the Israelites during their time in the Sinai Desert was most likely Grits. Critics disagree, stating that there is no record of biscuits, butter, salt, and red eye gravy raining down from the sky, and that God would no punish his people by forcing them to eat Grits without these key ingredients.

How Grits are Formed:

Grits are formed deep underground under intense heat and pressure. It takes over 1000 years to form a single grit. Most of the world's grit mines are in the state of South Carolina, and are guarded day and night by armed guards and pit bull dogs. Harvesting the Grit is a dangerous occupation, and many Grit miners lose their lives each year so that Grits can continue to be served morning after morning for breakfast (not that having Grits for lunch and dinner is out of the question).

Yankees have attempted to create a synthetic Grits. They call them Cream of Wheat. As far as we can tell the key ingredients of Cream of Wheat are Elmer's Glue and shredded Styrofoam. These synthetic grits have also been shown to cause nausea, and may leave you unable to have children.

Historical Grits:

As we mentioned earlier, the first known mention of the Grits was by the Ancient Israelites in the Sinai Desert. After that, the Grits was not heard from for another 1000 years. Experts feel that the Grits was used during this time only durning secret religious ceremonies, and was kept from the public due to it's rarity.

The next mention of the Grits was found amidst the ruins of the ancient city of Pompeii in a woman's personal diary. The woman's name was Herculaneum Jemimaneus (Aunt Jemima to her friends.)

Now you know more than you did know about grits, and probably some things that you might question the validity of. Oh ye of little faith!

Hummingbirds

I think hummingbirds are one of the most fascinating birds that God created and they certainly put on a show. I really don't know how many hummers we have eating at our feeder this year, but there must be twenty or thirty of them. Our feeder is located right outside of our kitchen bay window where our table is located, and when we sit down to eat we refer to it as our private dinner theater. This time of year they empty the feeder in less than two days and you can't look out the window without seeing one are more of them taking on some sugar water -- they sure are hungry little things. The short video below will give you some idea of what I am talking about. There is Olympic music playing in the background during some of the video (as the Olympics had just come on TV). If you could only enter the hummers in the Olympics -- they would even take home more gold than Michael Phelps.

All the GRANDS' at One Time

We were blessed this past Friday with all our Children and their families being at our house all in one day :). I was able to let all the grandsons fish and each one of them caught a fish -- however, they don't touch crickets or take the fish off the hook. I always thought that was part of fishing!

We had a great supper that night with grilled pork chops; potato, pea, & pasta salad. In other words we had pork chops with bunches of different type of salads. Kathy baked a wonderful lemon pound cake that would make your tongue slap your lips silly trying to get another bite.

With eight adults and six grandchildren in the house that night I would guess that OSHA would have fined us because the decibel level reached limits that would break most meters.

Saturday Kathy and I along with two of our little familes traveled to Canton, NC for a family reunion which was a great fellowship with family and more food than you could imagine. We brought Kathy's mother back home with us for a weeks visit - and of course to clean the house some while she is visiting.

I guess I had better stop now before I get in trouble.

"LOCKDOWN"

Working for the Department of Corrections is certainly going to be a real learning experience. On Monday June 30th there was an escape at the facility where the Frame Shop is located. I received a call at approximately 2:50pm that day informing me that the entire facility was on "lockdown" and there would be no movement by any of the inmates. Now that does not sound like a serious situation, but since I get off at 3:00pm that is a very serious situation because I can't go home until the inmates return back to the main facility. After making a few phone calls I was allowed to walk the inmates, that work for me, back to the main gate at approximately 3:30pm at which time I was allowed to leave for the day.
The next day I was not allowed to get any of the inmates because the facility was still on "lockdown". However, everything returned to normal on Wednesday July 2nd.
After contemplating on this entire situation I have to admit that I don't really understand why you have a "lockdown" when someone escapes. Is that not like shutting the barn door after all the animals have gotten out?

NAME CHANGE

I know it has been sometime since I have posted anything new to my blog, but starting a new job on May 19th has limited my goof-off time.

During my 45 year career in the Heavy Construction Equipment business I was like Rodney Dangerfield never getting any respect, but now that I am employed by the South Carolina
Department of Corrections I am getting the respect a gray haired old man deserves -- my name is now MR. WELLS.

I have not been employed a month yet, but I am learning how people on the other side of the fence live and I must say it is not a pretty sight. Folks I have seen the food they eat, some of the NON-Air conditioned facilities that they live in, how they are treated, and I for one never want to be a resident of a penal system.

There were two inmates that came an spoke to us during the week long orientation (or as I like to refer to it "Hell Week") that I just attended. One of the inmates said that the only difference between them an us was they had made some bad decisions and got caught when we had made our bad decisions we did not get caught. I think there is a lot of truth in that statement.

I am sure that I will have some stories to tell about my new employment adventure.

BACK IN THE WORK FORCE

Since I will be going back to work Monday morning I thought the following cartoon was in order:

It sure was fun while it Lasted!!

The Best Show on TV

We will have a new American Idol next week. Will it be David or David?

David Archuleta, David Cook & Syesha Mercado are a talented threesome, but unfortunately one of them had to go home last night and it was Syesha. Syesha really stepped up to the plate for the last three weeks and sang her heart out, but it was destined to come down to a duel between the two Davids. However, Syesha does not have to worry about her future - she has the looks and voice to become a recording star or a movie star.

My prediction is that David Archuleta will be the next American Idol, because he has all of the little teen girls in his corner and they will wear their fingers out sending text votes in for him. I think that David Cook is the most talented of the two, but I don't think he has the following that Archuleta has.

Tune in next week to see if this is fiction or fact.

POLITICAL NONSENSE

Just think the presidential election is not until November, and all of us are worn out listening to all of the campaign jargon. McCain has won the republican nomination, but Hillary and Obama are still slugging it out for the democratic nomination. Each candidate has spent millions of dollars trying to become our next president so they can make $400K annually. There is just something that don't add up with those numbers!

Well, I have a solution to eliminate all of this campaign mess, and that is to elect our president by the same method that the American Idol is selected. You could even have Randy, Paula and Simon judging, because they are there for entertainment only --- Wow! I would enjoy hearing what Simon had to tell some of the contestants (candidates). Anyway, there would be 12 finalist and each week the candidates would have five minutes to speak, sing or dance -- ever what they thought would get them the votes they needed to stay on the show. In less than three months we would have our next president selected and also would have been entertained (maybe).

As I see it there are a number of advantages to using the American Idol method.
1. We would not have to drive to the polls.
2. Sponsors would pay for the entire process.
3. We would not have to listen to the candidates for 2 years on the campaign trail.
4. We could call or text in our votes.
5. There would be no conventions taking up good TV time.
6. There would be no need for delegates or super delegates.
7. There would not be an electoral process.
8. The president would be elected entirely by popular vote.
9. We would save 1,000 of trees that are used to make the paper used for campaign posters.
10. Finally we would end up with just as good a president as doing it the old fashion way.

Out of all the Amerian Idols there has only been one bad one (Taylor Hicks) -- I don't think our percentages are that good with presidents, so maybe it is the method in which they are elected that needs to be changed.

LOOK FOR THIS TO TAKE PLACE IN FOUR YEARS!!!!!!

Keep Working or Retire? THAT IS THE QUESTION

This is for the men who might be thinking about retiring. You never know what your wife might have in store for you. KNOW THE FACTS BEFORE MAKING A DECISION!!